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Amazon — ‘Julie & Julia’

Relationships are all about one thing: teamwork. Admittedly, that’s not the most romantic and certainly not the sexiest thing you can say about being together with someone, but it’s the honest to God truth. Relationships are about teamwork. You’ve got be willing to work together to achieve what both of you have set out to do with your lives. You’ve got to be willing to support each other’s risks.

When you stop and think about it, that mantra can be scaled back from the entirety of your relationship goals to any situation you come across. One of those situations is your meals, specifically of the at home cooked variety (because there’s nothing loving about grunting that you wouldn’t mind ordering pizza — again). Cooking can serve as one of the great connecting points in your relationship if you allow it to work its course.

First, let’s pause briefly to consider the alternative to cooking together: one person works as a chef to feed to oh-so-noble significant other who’s watching TV waiting to be fed their final meal of the day. There’s obviously nothing wrong when in a relationship if one person is a masterful connoisseur of cuisine and they don’t mind cooking the meals. However, what starts out as, “I love your cooking,” can easily turn into, “Do you mind cooking again tonight?” and even worse, “When’s dinner going to be ready? Wondering if I should just DVR this show.”

When one person’s purpose in the relationship has become head chef, rather than co-lover, someone is going to get burned. It’s a grease fire waiting to happen, meaning you can only end it by covering it up. “Oh, I’m sorry. I just thought you really liked cooking. I’ll do the dishes to make it up to you (after I watch this show I DVR’ed).”

That’s why cooking together is a necessity. It signifies your love and support for one another. You’re sharing the duties and creating something that you can enjoy together. Maybe that’s a metaphor for procreating, maybe it’s not — you decide. Cooking together involves communication. Letting each other know what each other like. What feels the best. Following your instincts. Moving amongst one another to achieve a shared outcome.

When you cook together you both feel the heat (of the kitchen). Maybe there’s music playing. Things are sizzling. You can’t help but look at each other and smile. “What do you think about this?” “Oh yeah, do that!” Your bodies are close as one person bends over to get something from below the stove and the other is close behind, but reaching for something in the cabinet above. Your bodies become perfectly fit together in a shared, close-quartered space.

You’ve got to prep everything together, because you can’t just dive into it or you won’t reach the desired conclusion. There’s a process you must follow to get where you want to be, otherwise it ends in just a sweaty mess of, “That was okay. Not our best.” Cooking together involves one person being willing to stir things up, while the other embraces shaking things up. You can’t be afraid to get a little saucy, a little spicy and voice your inner fantasies of where you think all this could lead to.

When you cook together, you get to enjoy a feast together. It’s a two-way street of oral pleasure (taste buds). You get to have the shared experience of talking about how great the food is while enjoying that very food. The talking about the food and description of just how amazing it is only makes it seem so much more satisfying.

You feel like you’ve hardly come up for air throughout the entirety of the meal. You just want to keep going and going until you reach that climactic moment of an empty plate and full stomach. When you cook together, you both get to enjoy the coming of this moment together with equal satisfaction. You’ve both put in the same amount of work in multiple different positions throughout the evening.

When this moment finally arrives, you both burst out and gaze into each other’s eyes. “That was so incredible.” When you cook together, everybody wins. Everybody gets an equal share of that secret ingredient that goes into every steamy cooking session in the kitchen: love. And, that’s why cooking together signifies a loving relationship; the shared passion between two people results in an outward display of, “We both had our hands all over this, so now let’s see if we can reach that satisfactory moment together.”

When you cook together, you get through all the fumbling around in the middle and you both indulge in each other’s work…only to feel the ultimate satisfaction. You may even find yourself craving more of that secret love ingredient. “Want to go for Round Two?” Or, maybe you’ll say, “Want seconds?” However you put it, cooking together will cause both parties to desire more of that loving effort their significant other put into this activity.

Simply put, cooking together is a lot like sex. You could masturbate, but isn’t it a whole lot more fun when you bring somebody else into the equation?